‘Our pillow-talk is so different from what it used to be’, a married friend mentioned to my husband and I a couple weeks ago. I thought to myself, ‘Well, is it?’ Pillow-talk can be different for you depending on how you define it. One common way of defining pillow-talk is the whispering of sweet nothings to your significant other, typically in the bedroom or while lying down on a pillow and sharing close and/or intimate details about yourself in regards to sexual behaviors or thoughts. However, by my definition, pillow-talk is verbal communication where intimate details are shared. These details include sexual behaviors and the like yes, but it also includes details about your past, about your financial state, family relationships and anything else about who you are that you, under normal circumstances, would not share with most people. So, the question is asked, can you have pillow talk with an acquaintance? Absolutely. Would I recommend it? Absolutely not.
Pillow-talk builds and maintains intimacy. Creating intimacy of that nature in a purely sexual relationship creates blurred lines. But where is the fun in that you may say? As humans, we yearn to feel connected to one another and while sex may bring us physically close, it does not provide the warmth that emotional intimacy provides.
In marriage, pillow-talk is so amazing. You get to learn more about your lover, friend, spouse, business partner all at once. My favorite pillow talk sessions comes over the weekend when there is no immediate rush to get out of bed and we can just linger a little while longer. It’s also difficult to be angry with your spouse and engage im pillow-talk. Pillow-talk can be playful which can increase spice in the marriage so I dare you to try it! And if you are already doing it, do not stop. You may be surprised at what you can learn about your partner or what you may learn about yourself!
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