The Art of Listening

There are times we talk and after we have finished, we realize that what we said fell on deaf ears. Here’s the issue, you talk too much. I’m certain that got your attention.

Yes, we talk too much. What we have to say is very important information. Yet, it is difficult for us to effectively communicate our thoughts if we are unable to listen. To have a conversation is to have an exchange of thoughts – thoughts that are understood by all parties involved. Therefore, it is important to stretch the listening muscle.

Here are a few ways to stretch your listening muscle:

1.      Reflective listening – capture something from what the speaker is saying and repeat it.
2.      Ask questions – questions can be used to provide clarity on what the speaker is attempting to communicate
3.      Summarize – provide quick and succinct summaries of what the speaker is saying to show you are engaged and understood
4.      Body language – nod your head and demonstrate an “open posture” (uncross arms and legs) to show that you are open to what the speaker is saying

These skills can help improve conversations and it may even save you time. You can reduce repeating yourself, reduce time arguing with someone who may already agree with you and you may have an opportunity to learn from the other speaker. 

So ask yourself in the midst of your next argument, “What is being accomplished here? How can this discussion be more productive.” See how asking these questions turn out for you.